


Open Your Eyes

by Demon_Hades



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Drabble, Fluff, M/M, One Shot, Self Loathing, Shizuo deserves love, but like with feels, oh man
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-23
Updated: 2016-09-23
Packaged: 2018-09-01 16:06:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8630527
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Demon_Hades/pseuds/Demon_Hades
Summary: Sometimes he just wants to disappear.





	

He closed his eyes.

He wanted to shut out the world. 

He didn’t want to see the man sobbing below him, whose legs turned to jelly the moment Shizuo cracked the wall beside him with just a punch. He didn’t want to see the faces of the people looking at him, with either awe or terror, like he was a freak in an old timey circus. He didn’t want to see Tom’s face, he knew which face he wore; the one of worry, the one of caring, maybe he was even a little startled, but he’d never show that, not to Shizuo. 

He couldn’t see the carnage he created around him, but with his world blackened by eyelids, he couldn't help but focus on his hearing. 

He could hear the voices of onlookers, the uncontrollable weeping of the scared man below him, Tom’s gentle cooing. His heart beat thumped in his ear, clouding his hearing it and making everything sound as if his head was submerged in water. He couldn’t breath, the water was choking him.

He did it again. Got angry at their client, threw a punch, broke something, frightened everyone around him. His anger consumed him, controlled his limbs as if it were a puppeteer, and he was just a doll on strings. He couldn’t break his strings, no matter how hard he tried he could never be rid of his anger, it was just there. He wanted the strings to let go, they were so taut and stressed, it hurt. He wanted it gone, he wanted all of this gone. That’s why he tried to shut out the world. He didn’t want to see it anymore.

He hadn’t moved, he stayed frozen. His fist slightly bleeding onto cracked bricks, his body stiff as his head hung loosely, his messy hair falling over his tightly shut eyes. He had tried to block everything out, but one persistent noise kept surfacing over the haze.

“Shizuo.” Came Tom’s deep voice, so soft, so full of kindness. Tom cared about him too much, he didn’t deserve his name said with such a tone.

Shizuo scrunched his nose, wanting to shut his eyes tighter than what was physically possible. He didn’t want to drag Tom into this. His own personal spiraling void.

“Shizuo,” Tom said again. 

Something urged Shizuo to lift his head; not the puppet strings, but something else, something gentle. He nearly flinched at the sudden contact, not expecting the hand that suddenly caresses his cheek, tilting his head up. He knew Tom was there, turning his head so they could look each other in the face, but Shizuo refused to open his eyes. He never understood why Tom cared so much about him, he didn’t deserve it.

“Shizuo,” Tom repeated, over and over, caressing Shizuo until he relaxed into his hand. The tug on his strings loosened as he listened to Tom say his name, focused on the hand on his cheek.

The world was suddenly gone. There was nothing but Tom, his voice resonating from a chest so close to his own. Tom made everything disappear, and replaced it with himself. 

“Open your eyes.”

And he does. He slowly blinks his eyes open, dropping his gaze from Tom’s face, only until he sighs defeated and looks up at his friend.

“I’m here, okay Shizuo?” Tom says. “I won’t leave you,” his hand hasn’t moved from his cheek, not even when he shifts closer to him, and presses his lips against Shizuo’s. There was nothing in his world but Tom; the feeling of him, the smell, the taste, the sound. He felt the strings fall, as if Tom had managed to cut them. He was free when he was with Tom, he could block out the world and focus on his love.

Because Tom was his world.

**Author's Note:**

> posted [here](http://demon-of-ikebukuro.tumblr.com/post/150827837523/he-closed-his-eyes-he-wanted-to-shut-out-the)  
> I did have this as part of my drabble collection, but I loved this one and think it deserved its own spotlight.


End file.
